Why mother-in-laws and daughter-in-laws always have problem?

Exactly whose problem is this? For centuries and all throughout history, this seems to be a problem that cannot seems to be solved. So... I am not going to be giving you a solution either.

However, being a daughter-in-law and a future mother, i tried to understand what will cause me to be upset with someone who i think is trying to spend her rest of her life with my son. So let's try to analysis this together!

First of all, any girl who finds a man whom she love wishes that he will develop into the man she always what him to be. She may even wish that the man will be somewhat close to how their father is like. At the same time the man wishes the woman will grow into the likeness of their mother, In that process, it is inevitable for the couple to grow into the soul-mate of one another.

Then what causes the mother-in-law to be upset? Every mother loves their son just the way they are, the way they brought them up to be. When the son develops in the relationship, he slowly changes from the mummy's boy into the man the woman of his life yearns for. Hence, it causes the mother to think that the girl is trying to change her son, in her (protective) perspective, she believes that it is against the will of her son.

Believe it or not, i think that one of the way to make things better is for the son to bridge the gap. If the son remains loving to the mother and shares with her what is going on and let the mother grow together with his changes, it will be easier for the mother to see and develop together with the son, to love this woman whom he loves. At the same time, build the relationship between them, spending time together.

Only when the man loves and honors his mother, will the woman of his life learn to love and honour his mother. Many times, the man avoids talking to the mother about this woman and gets all defensive. So, whose problem is this exactly?




If the man could be a good bridge, mothers and daughters-in-law can be the best of friends! To the mothers, instead of losing her son, she can gain and daughter. And to the woman, she will gain a family and it will be a heaven on earth rather than a living hell. :P

Understanding Depression!

I came across this by the "World Health Organization" and i thought it was really helpful. Share it with people you love and care about because anyone could be suffering from depression that you didn't know about.

Personally, i do have my own periods of depression. But it is important how you deal with them. You can look through the images for:
- the statistics of depression all over the world
- what causes depression
- different types of depression and its symptoms
- seek help
- successful people with depression

Lastly at the end, you will find my personal tips to coping with depression :)

My tips to coping with depression are:
- surround yourself with friends, real friends!
- Pray and talk to your God! no one can be with you 24/7 except Him
- be active in your lifestyle. this will be hard but you got to purposefully go out and not stay home or in bed
- have a routine and stick with it
- it's ok to ask for help! there are a lot of helplines and counsellors and church leaders who are very trained in dealing with depression
- you need to know that you are not alone and you are not the only one going through this
- lastly, do happy things. Things that you love and you will enjoy!

Thankful for the girls!

This group started in 2007 with just 2 girls... and we grew... and doubled... and multiplied!

From teenage life, where we were busy about BGR... Hanging out late into the nights (like 4am), 3-4 times a week... Complaining about school and the petty little things...

To watching one another get into serious relationships, sharing the joy and the tears...

To organising Hen's night parties, preparing for the big days.. Weddings... Baby showers... Housewarming.... and many more to come!!!

Photos includes our partners and babies!

*missing our Eileen Soon & Family (in Kuching)

Maybe some people are envious on how we could keep the friendship strong despite of the different faces of life... Honestly, being a all girls group, you will know that it hasn't been easy... We had our fair share of ups and downs, struggles, joy and unhappiness, disagreements and disappointments...

Could we still be like how we were 8 years ago? meeting up 3-4 times a week till wee hours of the night? certainly NOT! Sometimes we hardly even meet up more than 7 times a year...

As i grow older... i'm not petty about whose right or wrong, who should do more or less, who deserve this or that... these all doesn't matter anymore.. I'm just thankful...

Very thankful for friends who stick it through good times and bad times... through different seasons and faces of life... through increase of commitments and expenses... still give their time and gifts (food and more food) and LOVE for one another!

Only friends can do crazy stuff together and yet laugh about it! I love you girls! 2015 will be a year where we will see each other a lot more!!! with the babies, new homes and weddings coming our way!

Photoshoot 2013!

Just had a photoshoot with a group of fun-loving people. Being in the same group for at least 3 years now for most of us, the 3 years have had it's ups and downs. Times where to laugh together, times where we hug and cried together.

This is the first time we are actually having a proper photoshoot together at Singapore, Clarke Quay! Video is a playback of our past, but photos are still memories stored.

Whole group photos!

Group shot with the girls!

 

Fashion shots!

Fun shot!

Photographer: Ivan Yeo (My Husband!) 

 Trust me, they are NOT doing what they look like they are doing! Just for laugh! ;)

Hopefully i have time to get the rest of the photos taken that day posted! :x

Friend or foe

This has always been a question in my mind. I'm not sure if I am over thinking or does anyone thinks about this as much as I do. I think I review this all the time especially with all the recent happenings. But still I guess some things never change and some things do change over time.

There's a saying in the Chinese, that "friends keep you close, but enemies keep you closer".

Have you ever felt like you are not sure whether someone is a friend or a foe?

Of course this don't happen to me all the time but a few times/person I guess. Friends who are so close but yet they give you a vibe that is strange, sending a shiver down your spine and leave you wondering... I always believe in giving people a 2nd chance or the benefit of doubt, believing that over time things will change!

There are friendships that I will say that I am willing to protect with my life, because I believe that friendship has got eternal value. But I guess if Jesus had judas and He still loved him till the cross, I need to accept the fact that there will always be people who are close to you for a different motive and may even deliver you to the cross. 

It takes more than just love to lay down your life for those who persecute you and sent you to the cross. It takes the perfect love of God, agape.

Could this be my turning point?

Time to pen down and get down to serious business. 

This morning i heard how 2 business person got their business started. One is but pure faith and curiosity while the other started off with a plan.

Which one worked? Both.

But the idea is, they got it started.
Having a plan and desire that sat in me for 10 years, i know that having a great idea will not get us anywhere.
Just in case you are like me, hoping that circumstances will change and it will finally be a good time? there will never be a perfect time.

People have always been telling me, it is not what you know but who you know. i always thought likely of it, till i realized that actually i am quite bad at networking and don't have any network to begin with!

Time to get down to work, time to build relationships and make friends!

Busy with what matters!

Sorry have been really really busy since i got back from my trip from Surabaya! It was the trip of the year for me!

Compared to all my other trips to various places, this is really the best trip in many years. This is not a shopping trip for me, it is a mission trip. It has been almost 2-3 years since i last went on a mission trip before this.

Busy but yet fulfilling. This trip reminded me alot of the things that are important to me and therefore since i was back, i have been really busy with them.

1) The top priority was my commitment to God again
Have been on a cruising season for awhile and it is time to get back on my feet! Have been going from meetings to meetings but yet only feeling even more energetic than ever! Cell group meetings, prayer meetings, leaders meetings, services to services... City Harvest Church, My Church My Life!

2) Friends
i am not a person who lives in my own fish tank behind this computer screen. I believe that God put everyone into our lives for a purpose even if they are just 'passing by' a season of our lives. From these trip, i got to know 20 awesome people and though some of them i met never get to meet again, the 2 weeks with them was the most well spent ever. even though i maybe very 'saving up' but yet when it comes to them, i know i will spend and i will sow into their lives. Thank God for 'Whatsapp' that still allows us to stay connected even though many of them are back in their own countries at the extreme parts of this world. I know that someday, we will meet again!

So happy that one of them are visiting next weekend! it's gonna be a girls night out!

3) Something greater
i don't know how to explain this and neither am i there yet. But i know God had began this work already and it will be done according to His time!

Was reminded of the 70, 12, and 3... something i always say last time. who is the 3 in my life and who are the 12? i think i know who are my 2 but can't really identify the 3rd one yet. At the same time, i wish i am one of the 3 that will be able to be close too.

Everything is made beautiful in His time!

Birthday Party!

Thanks for coming to my "Party of LOVE", birthday party last Sunday @ Verve Pizzeria! My birthday wish this year is to build stronger FRIENDSHIPS!

There are some things in life that money cannot buy and TRUE FRIENDSHIP is one of them! Hope you find your true friends in life too! ;)