Courtesy? #2 - Hoarding

This word "Hoarding" is a big word... It started with describing the human behavioural of hoarding food or natural supplies that they think will soon be in shortage.

And then it became a behavioural where everything is "MINE"... in this word "hoarding" there is no courtesy or sharing...

So how is this word being constantly seen in society nowadays? instead of just supplies....

Children at childcare centre hoarding all the toys and not allowing other children to play or touch those toys. Some parents even blame the school for not educating their children. But really, where are the kind of things taught at home? I believe that home is our first learning centre.

Then the very common and often seen in our daily life are people hoarding seats. The purpose of my post is not to embarrass anyone. Hence, I chose photos where faces are not revealed so that no one is put to shame.

This seat hoarding situation did not only limit to MRT but also cafes and eating places. Photos cannot be posted because faces are too close up and easily identified.

I'm sure many of us have faced frustrated situations, looking for seats at cafes or eating places. Waiting for people to finish their chit chatting, studying, 1 person taking 4 person's seats etc... all these happening during the peak hours. I understand that some times you are looking for places to study, hang out with friends etc and needed a place. I can totally understand this, because i do hang out at cafes and just relax, enjoying the ambience etc too.

I am referring to eating places where big crowds of people are standing around waiting. An act of courtesy or kindness would be, to share your table if you are alone or only taking up 2 out of 4 of the seats. :) i'm sure the people won't mind and will be really appreciative :)

Once i was at Soupspoon located at Bugis. it was peak hours at around 6.30pm where hungry people are hunting for food to fill their stomach after a long day of work. While many people are standing around looking for seats in the Soupspoon, i noticed a 4 seater table with some books and a school bag but no one was there. I waited for awhile to see if the person is ordering food etc. After 10-mins, the person still did not show up at the seat. So my friend and i decided to  sit at half of the table and leaving her things at the other half, to just have our meal.

We sat there and ate quickly as there were many other people waiting for a table. After close to an hour since we entered the shop, when we were about to finish and leave. The lady whom the books and bag belongs to came back and started to make a big fuss, raising her voice. She made a scene about us sitting on her seat and that she had placed her things there to show that the table is taken. Its obvious that she is not eating and neither is she really present at the seat because it was an hour since i saw her.

After making a huge commotion in the eatery, people around are feeling uncomfortable in the unpleasant situation, we realised that the boyfriend is one of the staff working. And she started scolding the boyfriend and embarrassing my friend and i publicly. It was a really awful experience.

Let's be people who are kind and passionate towards fellow humans. Sharing tables, giving up seats that you do not need or even to make an effort to finish up faster, can really help brighten someone's day. Caring and sharing is the opposite of hoarding. Some things may be OURS, but i think we can be kind to share it with someone in need.

Of course, the most important and easiest expression of courtesy is a smile. A smile can go a very long way and it can be passed on from one person to another :)

Expectation management

Feeling rather disturbed today... Started the day feeling very very emotional..

Started off with the build up of emotions and irritation and pressure from this trip... Honestly I never felt like I wanted to go home so much.. I miss my home, my poshie, my husband..

But at the same time, I learnt a important lesson today...

Not everyone is willing and able to share how you feel.... Some people can only share your joy and when things are going smooth and where nothing deep are shared.. And when u really share some things that mean a lot to you, they don't reply or reply with sweeping statements that actually makes you feel worse.. This is why, you cannot share everything with everyone..

What are we really looking for in our sharing? A listening ear, where you know that they really did read your msges... Not feeling like the msges ended up no where... or even, some times replies sounds like it doesn't even require them to have read your msges.. Hahahaha!

Is it really possible to expect others to understand what I am going through? Hahaha I know it is not.. But some times, we just need to feel that we are important and cared for.. And at least there's a reply after reading...

But at the same time, I learnt that people's importance to us in our lives does not equal to our importance to them.. And this is where expectations got to be managed.. Disappoinent happens when we expect something and it doesn't happen..

Expecting a simple reply, a simple reassurance, a simple message to know that you are remembered.... Can result to great disappointment...

Is it possible to live a life with no expectations?

Does it really make one happier?

Should priority be rearranged so that with the drop of importance, the effect and expectations will also be lowered?

And this is not the end... Going for the last dinner together on this trip soon and hoping and praying that it will turn out to be a fine experience... So that I can at least some a bit of good memories with me at the end..

Girls Party!

Girls Party means...

Cakes!

Muffins!

Sweet stuff!

Cookies!

English Tea!

and of course, heart to heart sharing! <3 <3 <3